This entry was originally posted on August 18, 2008. (I’m re-creating my lost archives.)
We all know that being a mom means giving up a lot of things, and yes, we get back lots of blessings in return. But does anyone else out there totally fail in that balancing trick between give your whole self to your job as a mother and put yourself first? I figure it’s impossible; it’s like trying to take a shower and blow dry your hair at the same time… you’re going to get burned! And I get the whole concept of if you don’t take care of yourself then there’s less of you to give, but exactly how does that work when even the 110% version of yourself probably isn’t enough to get it all done anyway? (I mean, seriously, if you could see my house right now, you would laugh out loud that I’m dispensing anything remotely resembling advice or wisdom of any kind.)
The only way that I’ve been able to come to terms with this is the Christian doctrine of grace… the whole concept of Do the very best that you can, and the Lord will make up the difference. And let’s face it, He’s not going to step in and finish off the laundry or strike your screaming child mute for the last 5 minutes of the ride home, but I take confidence in the hope that He will let my children turn out alright anyway. He won’t let my frequent failures and occasional disasters be the tragic flaw in my overall motherhood effort. I believe God will overlook my shortcomings and bless my sincere efforts; He will make it all turn out as if I’d done it right in the first place. So maybe it’s fantasy, but it gets me through… doesn’t it make you feel better too?
7 thoughts on “Sacrifice: the delicate balance”
I started to comment on this, and realized it was turning into a post. So I’m going to spare your fans my diatribe and tell you my favorite part of this post was the drying-your-hair-in-the-shower analogy.
And maybe I’ll do a post on what WAS here to begin with!
That DEFINITELY makes me feel better. I was just whining to Dal about how I’m not sure if Isabel will turn out alright if I keep being her mother…. but now that you mention it, I AM doing to my best and Heavenly Father can see that. He’s also promised me that my children will turn out pretty good if I incorporate the gospel in their lives.
I stink at the balance part. When I “take care of myself” everything else seems to fall apart. When I “take care of the family” I seem to fall apart. I don’t know how to merge them together…still learning.
Great post (as usual.)
Yesterday I decided to forgo the delicious morning nap with the baby to try to get some things done that I’d been trying to get to all week. I got about 2 tiny things knocked off my long list, but the main difference it made was that I *felt* like I was making progress — even though by the end of the day the house was as messy, or messier, than it had been all week. I do fully rely on grace because what I can manage to do is just never enough. (And this morning I did take a nap with the baby. And it was delicious.)
Here’s to Hope (that the kids will turn out okay–because I know even my 100% isn’t good enough)!
This is what I tell myself too. It has to be true. Grace is real. Even if our kids go through some bumpy things in life, they’ll turn out OK in the end, despite me.
“…I take confidence in the hope that He will let my children turn out alright anyway. He won’t let my frequent failures and occasional disasters be the tragic flaw in my overall motherhood effort. I believe God will overlook my shortcomings and bless my sincere efforts; He will make it all turn out as if I’d done it right in the first place.”
Thank you for sharing this. I too believe that Grace works and that the Atonement can make all circumstances better than they would have been left on their own. I don’t believe it’s just wishful thinking. It may not all turn out exactly the way we want it or when we want it, but it will all turn out well in the end if we do our best and depend on the Lord to fill in the rest…all along the way. 🙂