I want to talk about stages of life.
Since early 2003, concepts like “personal space,” “alone time,” and “R&R” have only been dreamed about. Fantasized, even. Small children are parasites. They cling on you, suck the life out of you, and basically consume you– blood, sweat and tears. Of course, they’re also darling little bundles of spirit and light that shape our souls like nothing else, but that’s not the point of this post. Mothering small children is hard.
Today was the first day of school in my neck of the woods. Early this morning, Grant got up and excitedly got ready for his first day of first grade. He gathered all his stuff (and made a weird face when he was supposed to say cheese).
We all went outside and waited at the neighborhood bus stop with a gaggle of school-goers and their siblings.
Then we went back inside and began loading up Clark’s backpack with all the goods he would need for his first day of kindergarten, half day in the afternoon. He and Natalie played nicely together for most of the morning and we had a little lunch and readied him for his big moment.
He was the most excited about finally riding the bus.
And he was off. Natalie and I walked inside and she was ready to begin “Mommy School.”
We hopped in the car, went to the store, purchased cupcake ingredients, zipped back home, and made pumpkin cupcakes for the boys’ first day after-school snack.
She finished dumping the batter into cupcake liners, washed her hands, and I put her down for her afternoon nap.
The house was quiet. I paid bills. I made phone calls. I signed up the boys for swimming lessons. I checked email. Fifteen minutes before the afternoon bus returned my boys, Natalie woke up from her two-hour nap. We frosted the cupcakes and went outside to wait for her brothers.
They arrived, happy and excited.
Natalie proudly shared her surprise.
They told me about their day, called grandparents and repeated themselves several times, and we took a trip to the library. Now they’re all in bed, asleep.
It. Was. Awesome.
Ladies and gentlemen, I did it. I graduated to a new stage. A stage I thought would never come. I now have some free time every day. I have quiet. I have personal space. I could take a nap!!
So, I just wanted to bear my testimony that the stages in life you long for really do come. Did I feel a twinge of regret about the things I probably should have done with them, the things I should have taught them better, all those years while they were practically surgically attached to me twenty-four hours a day? Yes, I won’t lie. But mostly, I got an unexpected lesson about my stewardship, and realized that with this new stage comes a new level of accountability. All those important things that have been left undone for years because “there’s just no way” need to become part of my new reality. Either that, or I’m a hypocrite. I need to be responsible with the time I’ve been gifted and use it in ways that make me proud and still bless my family. My “calling” as a mother is still the same, and I need to hold tight to my priorities now more than ever. I don’t want to waste my new-found freedom.
And some day when I hit other stages, like all my kids at school all day, or they’re off to college, or Matt’s finally retired, my responsibilities will rise to the occasion. A few scriptures come to mind, including, “To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven, ” and “It is not requisite that a [woman] run faster than [she] has strength, … therefore, all things must be done in order.”
So, this is basically a rally-cry to all you Stage One moms: Stage Two really will come! And to all you Stage Two moms: Let’s do this right! And to all you Stage Three and Four and Five moms: I hate you. Just kidding.
The stuff we suffer will pass. The stuff we hope for will come to pass. Stages in life are good. They are tangible markers of the progress of our souls. I hope I leave a good mark.
“Hopefully you will find joy in your womanhood during all stages of your life.” — James E. Faust
“The challenges you face, the growth experiences you encounter, are intended to be temporary scenes played out on the stage of a life of continuing peace and happiness. It is your understanding and application of the laws of God that will give your life glorious purpose as you ascend and conquer the difficulties of life.” — Richard G. Scott