Author Archives: S.D. Sorensen

A few good men

Posted in Divinity by

ensign dadsThis blog is intended to celebrate (and laugh at) motherhood, and it’s true that we are all amazing (feel free to replace that with whatever other narcissistic adjective makes you feel good), but I’ve felt inspired to give dads their moment in the spotlight today.

Whenever the general conference issue of the Ensign is published, I love to flip through the pages and look at the pictures.  I don’t know why really, they’ve never seemed extraordinarily inspiring– maybe I’m self-absorbed enough to believe that I’ll actually know some of the people in those photos and be kind of famous by association.  Anyway, the picture above caught my eye.   I looked at it for a minute or so, and it actually brought tears to my eyes.  I’m not a very weepy person, really, but something about it was so endearing to me.  I felt so proud of them (strangers–they all live in Ukraine, so I didn’t date any of them or anything) because they stood there under that picture of the Savior holding little children and just being dads in every right sense of the word.  And in a very Grinch-like way, my heart grew a few sizes in honor of the good fathers out there who are being what God intended them to be.

My husband I were laughing the other night about a music mix I had in college called the Love is False and Men Suck Mix.  I probably don’t have to go into great detail about what kind of mood I was in when I would listen to it, but my dating years taught me that many men were irresponsible, selfish, and pretty undisciplined.  (I’m generalizing… there were also a few nice boys that just happened to be too dumb to fall completely in love with me.)  Even now, with a husband who is a righteous and honorable man, I sometimes find myself losing faith in mankind in general.  I make the mistake of reading the news or watching TV and I start thinking about what a bunch of decadent pigs they are.

I spent time this summer with a dear friend from my college years (and actually a co-creator of that Love is False mix) and we discussed this topic among many other long-lost girlfriend kinds of topics.  She said something to me that changed my attitude.  I’ll paraphrase.  “You know, I think that’s all part of Satan’s plan.  He wants us to look at men like walking [male anatomy].  That destroys the possibility of having meaningful relationships and loving families.  Think of all the shows on TV…. how many of them have male characters that are kind, caring, compassionate or anything resembling righteous?  Just like Satan wants men to see all women in the wrong way, he also wants us women to see men as something less than they were meant to be.”  Okay, I really paraphrased a lot, but that was her basic point and it chastened me.  She was so right.  I’d been suckered into believing a little bit of what Satan wanted me to believe.  And since then, I’ve tried harder to appreciate the divine role of men and give them more credit for the good, even great things they do.

So to the three Ukranian fathers and all the good dads out there who do this:

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and this:

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and this:

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and this:

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and this:

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Thank You!  You make it easy for our hearts to love you and for our children to respect you. God Bless all the good men that are still doing the right things for the right reasons.

“How much more beautiful would be the world and the society in which we live if every father looked upon his children as the most precious of his assets, if he led them by the power of his example in kindness and love, and if in times of stress he blessed them by the authority of the holy priesthood; and if every mother regarded her children as the jewels of her life, as gifts from the God of heaven, who is their Eternal Father, and brought them up with true affection in the wisdom and admonition of the Lord.” — Gordon B. Hinckley

Happy Father’s Day.

(This post was originally published on November 10, 2008.  I posted it again to recreate my lost archives, and in honor of Father’s Day and Matt’s birthday this weekend.  I love you, Matt.)

So you ordered more slop, did you?

Posted in Diapers by

Well how’s this for a 3-course meal of it?…

1.  Yesterday, Natalie kept tossing a hot-pad at me while I was changing her diaper. (Feel free to unsubscribe right away if you are violently opposed to kitchen items being found at random in children’s bedrooms and stuffed animals and library books being found on kitchen floors.)  Once it flew past me, and I teased her by saying, “You missed me, you missed me, now you have to kiss me,” and I scooped her up and attacked her with kisses all over her face and neck.  She let out this delightful belly laugh that I’d never heard before and it cracked both of us up.  I said, “Was that funny?” She sighed and replied, “Yeah, I laughed like a grandpa.”  The rest of the day I laughed every time I thought about it.

2.  Today, we dropped off a wedding gift at the house of Clark’s Primary teacher.  She wasn’t home, so we left it with her little brother.  As we walked back to the car, Clark asked where she was, and I explained that she was probably at work.  Grant said, “Clark, did you know that some girls go to work?”  Clark said, “really?” and Grant affirmed, “Yep, it’s true.  Sometimes girls go to work.”  (Please be advised that this is observation based on their own reality and not because of some ultra-conservative sexist indoctrination.)   Clark thought for a few minutes while he buckled himself into his car seat and then piped up, “I wish mommy went to work so daddy could stay home with us.”  I would like to announce that my greatest moment of self-control today was not responding to that comment at all.  I did tell Matt later and he laughed (alone) and said it’s probably just because he lets them watch shows all the time.  This is not a funny story.  Do not say “LOL” in the comments.

3.  (Kristina P, you’re gonna love this one.)  Remember my brother Greg who won the Cheapest of the Cheap contest in Nashville?  I’m quoting here a story his wife Mindy told about the most hilarious thing that happened to him last week on the airplane:

“First of all, the life of Greg pretty much makes me laugh. He is just one in a million…truly! One of my favorite things about him is that he knows/cares very little about famous people. Let me explain. I just got off the phone with him( he is currently heading home from Mexico.)

On his first flight he sat in the very last row of the airplane and started chatting with a lady sitting next to him. They first talked about how the back of the plane smells because you’re right next to the lavatory…:) Anyway, she couldn’t get her new cell phone to work so of course Greg helped her out. Since Greg has been coveting the phone she just bought and is considering getting one for himself, he asked her if he could fiddle around with it for a while. She was more than happy to let him use it.

Meanwhile, he opened his laptop and on his screen saver was a 350Z (a Nissan sports car). She saw it and started talking about how she herself has one and is now wanting to order a 370Z with red leather interior. She also talked about 3 other cars she had purchased in the last year. Since Greg knows everything about cars (since he works with the creation of them)…they had a great conversation. Well, this lady nodded off (in her dark glasses and hair in a ponytail) and Greg felt a tap on his shoulder. The flight attendant asked him, “Would you mind handing me Beyonce’s empty cup?” Greg, still not sure what Beyonce’ even looked like but knew the name, started to laugh inside.

Hilarious! So Hilarious because that’s so Greg. We had a good laugh! I told him he should have sent me a text from her phone(could you imagine Greg/me having her phone number?)…yet he’s (respectfully) too innocent to do that…his wife on the other hand…not so much:) Life is good!”

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I told him that when she made the comment about his computer screen he should have said, “If you liked it then you should have put a ring on it.”  Am I the only person that thinks that’s funny?

I like you, and my toe itches.

Posted in Diapers by

SmileyFace3I have a few really important things to say.  (It’s after midnight, and my sense of what’s worth saying and what’s not might be slightly warped.)

First of all, I just want to say that all your comments on my I-just-got-home-from-EFY post were just like narcotics Lindt milk chocolate truffles the nicest thing ever.  I promise I did not write the summary of my angst and puke and such to solicit all of those “you are amazing” type comments, but I’m thinking I should undergo some major stress more often just to hear it.  What is truly amazing is that both friends and “strangers” will be so generous with their encouragement and praise.  Thank you.  You made me feel great.

It only took me about 48 hours to return my home from the lovely place of order that my mom created in my absense to the oh-look-Stephanie-the-queen-of-entropy-is-home current state of things.  I keep thinking maybe I’ll grow up and be more like my mom, but I’m not so sure.

If you have little boys and they’ve never watched Swiss Family Robinson, they should.  Mine love it.  Shipwrecks, wild animals, dream treehouse, pirates, booby traps, what’s not to love?

Summer is great because winter sucks, but I do sense a blog slump coming on.  With children running around here all day and those long lists of things to do now that it’s finally warm, a person can stay pretty busy.

I did make a summer weekly schedule where we have a routine for each day of the week.  We try to balance out some fun things and some important things like service, chores, and gospel study.  Let me just say that after 3 whole days it’s a raving success.  I hope it doesn’t lose its thunder.

I’m excited to start camping again.  We have a pop-up camper/trailer and it makes for some fun family times.  Matt’s birthday is this weekend, and we’re going to go camping in celebration of that and Father’s Day.  For the next month, I will then only be ONE year older than Matt and he can’t make all his dumb jokes about me being a cradle robber when we all know that he was the one who was hot on my trail and he’s lucky I decided to let myself date someone the same age as my younger brother.

I went to the gym and exercised at SIX o’clock this morning.  I think this is a sign of the Second Coming.

My toe really does itch, by the way.  I need to use more lotion.

I love you guys.  Thanks for letting me write a bunch of slop like this occasionally and then still coming back.

General Conference Book Club Week 10: Elder Bednar

Posted in General Conference Book Club by

05_02_bednaFirst of all, thank you for your kind and very supportive comments on my last post.  I want to address that some more, but I’ll save it for tomorrow I think.

Welcome back to General Conference Book Club, Week TEN!  I’m not sure I’ve stuck with many goals for ten weeks before, so congratulations to all of you who are still with me on this little study journey.  Even if you’re not participating in the actual club readings, go back and read people’s great comments on the GCBC posts because they really do have some amazing insights and testimonies.

This week’s talk is “Honorably Hold a Name and Standing” by Elder David A. Bednar of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles.  To be honest, I don’t remember much about this talk, but I do remember how he powerfully expressed his testimony at the end.  I look forward to going back and studying it more carefully.

If this is your first visit to the General Conference Book Club, click here to learn more about it. You’re welcome to join us at any point along the way.

>>Click here to read the talk “Honorably Hold a Name and Standing” by Elder David A. Bednar <<

I’ve included this video produced by the Church as a reminder of how our lives are blessed by the temple.

Have a great week.  God Bless.

I’m alive and well . . . well, mostly well.

Posted in Diapers, Divinity by

EFY_Theme_2009_smallSo, I just got back this afternoon from my journey to Brigham Young University to speak at Especially for Youth.  I had a good experience overall.  I get pretty nervous when I teach at EFY, mostly because I put a lot of pressure on myself to be exceptional.  I just figure if they fly you all the way out there, and the kids pay money to come, you better do a pretty darn good job, so I stress out a little bit hoping I can measure up to expectations.  Some have asked what I taught about, so here are the titles and class descriptions.  I taught each class twice.

General Conference Workshop:  What God’s Saying Today
There are living prophets on earth that speak for our Heavenly Father and teach us what He wants us to know; Their teachings are relevant to our happiness and essential for our safety. This class will be a study of the recent words from the First Presidency and Twelve Apostles. In a workshop setting, you will practice studying and personally applying the modern revelation that we hear at General Conference.

The Law of the Harvest:  Growing the Life You Want
The Savior spoke a simple parable about planting seeds that teaches us about our own role in achieving our goals. We’ll look at the spiritual and day-to-day applications of the Law of the Harvest, including how it helps us to better understand the Atonement of Jesus Christ.

Get Over Yourself.
Do you sometimes find yourself consumed with your own feelings, problems, worries and disappointments? Jesus Christ taught us how we can lose our lives in His service, and He promises that our burdens can be made light. We’ll discuss ways that you can step outside of yourself, turn your focus to others and the Savior, and develop a Zion heart.

Mission Prep 101:  How to Start Now to Become the Best Missionary You Can Be
The Lord needs the very best to do His work. We will study and discuss what the modern-day prophets and apostles teach about how to best prepare for missionary service. There’s much you can do right now to invest in a successful and powerful mission. Even if you are undecided about a mission, these suggestions will help you live a happier life right now as a disciple of Jesus Christ.

The good news:

1.  I got to go out to dinner with this lovely lady Mary, who I only knew through her comments here on my blog.  It was so fun.  I have to say that this meeting friends online business is totally legit.  She was charming and bright, and I couldn’t believe how many connections and coincidental life experiences we shared.  I’ve always been a tad bit skeptical of Internet dating and such (with all the weirdos out there and all–  Mary assured me that she was NOT really a 50-year old predator named Victor).  But, if this had been an internet dating event, and I happened to be a guy, I would definitely ask Mary to go on a second date.  My husband will say that was a dumb thing to say, but I know you women will understand what I meant and what I didn’t mean.  Thanks Mary!

2.  While I was gone, a delicious batch of homemade Pecan Praline Fudge arrived at my house from the lovely Melanie J. My dad was so excited to receive it in my absence.  He did leave some for me, thank goodness, but if it had not arrived, it’s possible that my parents’ stint as babysitters for four days may not have been worth it.  As it is, they left content, and with a bag of the last remaining pieces of fudge for the road trip home.  Thank you, Melanie!

3.  So after I teach each class, I always feel a little unsettled because it’s so hard to tell if it went well or not.  You think it went okay, but you’re never sure.  A few youth come up and say “Thank you,” or even that they liked the class a lot, but you still wonder if they’re just saying that to be polite since you flew all the way out there to talk to them and all.  Anyway, I always wish there were some instant feedback button where their heads all light up when they feel the Spirit of the talk and make some life-changing decision based on your message.  Or maybe not.  But anyway, at the end of my last class yesterday, the room emptied as all the youth ran off to enjoy their much-anticipated free time.  One boy, probably about 16 years old, came back into the room and approached me as I was packing up my things.  He says softly, “Um, this is going to sound kind of cheesy, but . . . when I came into your class today, I didn’t know if I was going to serve a mission or not, but now I’m going to go.”  I said, “That’s awesome!  That’s not cheesy.  That’s how the Spirit works; it changes you.”  He smiled and said, “Yeah, so thanks.”  “Thank you. You totally made my day.”  He left.  And I cried.  I figured that even if all my talks sucked and I got horrible evaluations, just that one kid who made that decision made it all worth it.  Seriously.

The bad news:

Apparently all that nervous pressure I put on myself about my talks took a toll on me a little bit.  I developed a tension headache by the end of each day, and last night my Tylenol didn’t quite put a dent in it.  I slept really poorly all night long, and by the time I woke up, it was a migraine.  My sweet brother Steve drove me to the airport at 5, yes, 5 a.m., and the oncoming headlights and streetlights were making me nauseous.  Combined with the vibration of the car and the sounds on the radio, my head was experiencing some serious sensory overload.  We stopped and I bought some Excedrin at a gas station, but a few minutes down the road, I knew I was not well.  “I think I’m going to throw up.  For real!”  Steve was flying down the freeway and it all happened so fast.  I emptied out his Wal-Mart bag and used it as my receptacle.  It had a hole.  It had been many, many years since I threw up last, and I have a phobia, so it was not pretty.  Poor Steve was driving with one hand and patting me on the back with the other, seemingly unaffected by the fact that I was filling his passenger seat with bodily refuse.  Did I already say it was not pretty?

He pulled over to a 7-11, where I pulled my drenched lower half slowly out of the car and went to the trunk to dig some dirty (but dry) pants and underwear from my suitcase.  The restroom was locked and a sign said “Out of Service,” but the attendant took one look at me and let me in.  I actually did feel much better after I puked and changed my clothes, and luckily I was fine for my two flights home.  I still have a slight headache now, but I’m lucky I was able to fly as well as I did today.  So, I’m off to bed in hopes that a good night’s sleep will do wonders.  It’s good to be home.