I am evolving. No one is more shocked than I am.

In the last couple years,  I’ve written a few posts that have revealed some of my personality points that seem a little . . . well, at odds …with how I perceive my role as a mother should be.

For example, I once wrote a post called “Other People’s Children,” in which I said:

When there’s a family in need, and they pass around a sign-up sheet at church, I’ll sign up to make them ten meals if I can, but please don’t make me watch their kids! . . . If funds were super tight, I think it’s more likely that I would take a job at a gas station cleaning toilets than run a day care out of my home.

I also wrote a post called “I Hate Playing With My Children,” where I admitted the following:

I hate tea parties.
I hate Stratego, and Candy Land and Chutes and Ladders, and Hungry Hungry Hippos, Lucky Ducks, and especially Don’t Break the Ice.
I hate pretending I’m an animal.
I can’t stand holding little toys and making them have conversations with each other.
I really don’t enjoy activities where all the cushions and pillows from my couches are spread haphazardly on the floor throughout my house.
I would rather clean out my closets than use a silly, high voice and make Webkinz tell jokes to each other while they bonk each other on the head. . . .

And yet here I am.
A mother of three small children. They love to play.
And they want me to play with them, which I am as excited to do as I am to train for a marathon. Sometimes it feels that hard.

So.  What I am about to say may just blow your mind.

1.  Matt was out of town last weekend, so it was just me and the kids at home.  We didn’t even go anywhere.  We played games, and painted pictures, baked cookies, read stories, and made friendship bracelets.  And I liked it.  My children are now big enough that we can play normal games and not brainless toddler garbage.  They can help me in the kitchen a little without making me develop a nervous tic.

2.  Tomorrow I am hosting a little party at my house where there could be 30 children or more in my house watching a movie and eating stuff and making all kinds of child-related noise.  And I’m looking forward to it.  *pausing to let that sink in*  I know.  It is weird.

The point of this post is not to say that it’s time for me to have more children, so don’t get cheeky and put that in the comments, nor is it to point out that I might get translated at any given moment (though I probably should be, don’t you think?), but it’s mostly to point out and relish the fact that I am growing into my children more and more.  I am becoming more comfortable with things I previously claimed to “hate,” and part of that is simply because they are growing up and have reached a stage that my personality feels more equipped to handle. (So really, when I say I’m evolving, what I really mean is my children are evolving.  They are becoming much more human and much less alien.  It’s a good thing.)

In speaking of mothers generally, I especially wish to praise and encourage young mothers. The work of a mother is hard, too often unheralded work. . . . Do the best you can through these years, but whatever else you do, cherish that role that is so uniquely yours and for which heaven itself sends angels to watch over you and your little ones. . . .  Remember, “To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.”  — Jeffrey R. Holland, “Because She Is a Mother”, Ensign, May 1997

General Conference Book Club Week 4: Elder Snow

04_02_snow For week 4, I have selected the talk called “Get On with Our Lives” given in the Sunday morning session of conference by Elder Steven E. Snow.  He acknowledges that all of us struggle with change, and lays out some ways that we can prepare for it and progress through it when it comes.

>>Click here to read the talk “Get On with Our Lives” by Elder Steven E. Snow.<<

The GCBC pattern is:  Read.  Ponder.  Comment.  Then read everyone else’s great comments. 🙂 As in weeks past, just leave your comments here on this post.  The previous weeks’ posts will remain open indefinitely, so you can always return to catch up or revisit those great talks as well.

If this is your first visit to the General Conference Book Club, click here to learn more about it. You’re welcome to join us at any point along the way.

I just got into town and I had not yet thought through which talk to choose for this week (By the way, I learned so many great things at Women’s Conference and I can’t wait to share them with you.), so I resorted to a random number generator online to pick a talk.  This one came up.  Initially, I thought “nah, that’s not really what I had in mind,” and almost started over, but then I began to read through it.  I personally am not going through any big changes at the moment, but something stuck out to me that’s in line with a lesson I feel the Spirit has been teaching me lately.  I am learning how important our PROCESS of becoming is.  It might even be more important than the actual becoming.  I guess I’ll restrain myself and save all my input for the comments section after I’ve read more thoroughly.  Can’t wait to hear what you have to say.  Thanks so much to all of you that have been so enthusiastic about this GCBC; it’s been great for me.

(p.s.  Thanks also to those of you who commented on my Mormon Mommy Blogs guest post and made me feel so good. If you haven’t seen it  yet, hop over and check it out because I was pretty darn proud of it.  Pretend that sounded meek and humble.)