Clark started school today.  Grant starts tomorrow.  Natalie starts next week.  I tried really hard to be as organized and ready as possible, and so far, so good.  Look how grown up my sweet Clark is.  He lost his front tooth just in time to start 2nd grade.

So I turned over lunch-making responsibilities to the boys for their own school lunches.  I made these boxes of different food categories.  They take one of each, make their own sandwich, and put in the fridge for the morning.  Then I don’t have to worry about it.  It’s part of their evening routine, along with laying out clothes for the next day.  They’re excited, I’m excited.  Hope it works.

And our new schedule/routine is up.  Thanks to Allison for her cool, free people clipart.

Also, about the backtalk problem we’ve had around here, I’m moving forward on a suggestion by my dad while he was visiting.  We just give them a hard-labor job when they are disrespectful.  Today Natalie had a sassy-fit and ended up outside in the yard with a hat and some gloves and was told she could come in for dinner when the bucket was full of weeds.  Just seeing her out there in the yard picking weeds kept the boys on their best behavior for the rest of the night.

I just want to say that, despite my expressions of deep frustration in the past, we have had several weeks in a row of really nice Family Home Evenings.  We still do a lot of policing (“Sit down.”  “Don’t touch each other.”), but we’ve had good gospel discussions, we’ve shared testimonies and experiences, and we’ve felt the Spirit.  I don’t say this to rub it in; I was hoping it might give people some hope that there is life after death-by-Family-Home-Evening.  I’m guessing we’re in a temporary “moments of joy” stage that Elder Ballard testified would come amid the frustrations.

In other news, I had the opportunity to speak at my ward’s youth Standards Night fireside last night.  A couple thoughts about the experience:  1) When you plead with the Lord to help you do something that feels a little overwhelming, He does.  Help you, I mean. 2) While I was studying For the Strength of Youth’s guidelines about Entertainment & Media, I felt the Spirit telling me that he’s been trying to tell me for quite a while that a couple of my favorite shows have gone downhill, and maybe it’s time to let them go.  So I am.  Yes, I’ll miss them, but my life won’t be empty without them.  I only had 2 or 3 shows I followed anyway, so maybe I’ll have time to work on some more important stuff now.  Since I committed to drop them, I already feel something different.

Anyway,  have a great week.  And best wishes to all you back-to-school moms.  We will survive.  Right?

Yesterday I woke up to Clark running into my room telling me that Grant was bugging him so bad that he made him drop 3 bowls of oatmeal on the floor.

Right.

By 8 a.m., I had already posted the following status on Facebook:

Goal for today: Do not sell the children. Do not harm the children.

I just want to report that despite going to the store and having the same kind of experience there that I would have had if I had rented 3 chimpanzees to accompany me …

… and listening to cackling, arguing, tattling madness everywhere I went in our van (a.k.a. parental torture chamber on wheels) …

… and asking my children over and over and over again to do their chores, and when they finally got moving in the late afternoon, I had to clean up some kind of mysterious collision that resulted in 3 large glasses shattering and scattering all over the kitchen floor …

… and trying to watch a movie together where Grant asked me every few seconds what was happening despite the fact that the movie was trying to explain what was happening if he would actually listen …

… and making a dinner that was noticeably insufficient for the starving, suffering masses,

I survived.  At Family Home Evening I bore my testimony about the scriptures, and shared a personal, uplifting story that went something like this:

I just want you children to know that if I had not read my scriptures this morning, it’s quite likely that I would have killed you today.

It was a touching moment.  You had to be there.

Carry on.

I’ve been thinking about judgment quite a bit lately.  I’ve always loved getting to know different people and learning about different cultures, and I think I do a good job of appreciating those kinds of differences.  And yet, somehow, in our own communities and shared cultures, we’re so quick to judge because maybe we think that people “like us” should look more or act more like us.  And when they don’t . . .  we compare.  We either put them down or envy them.  Frankly, it’s stupid.  Unfortunately, I’m not immune to stupidity.  A couple cases in point:

When we were house shopping I was annoyed with strangers who don’t take care of their yards.  All the houses around them seemed to look well manicured, but there always seemed to be one or two dump-yards.  I thought, Seriously, how hard can it be to put in your grass and maintain a yard?  Well, we made a huge landscaping “mistake” at our house recently that resulted in having to tear up our lawn, our sprinkler system, and other things that should not have been damaged, but were.  The result has been a completely unsightly, in-progress yard and a bill that is way over our heads.  It’s impossible to make it look like I want by the time I want it done because of our existing time and money restraints.  So, ladies and gentleman, I am those people.  I have become what I judged.

Yesterday, I went to Arctic Circle (I’ve never been before, but my kids had a coupon for a sundae) and while I sat and ate lunch with them, I watched an interesting crowd come and go.  At one point, a … shall we say large in girth?… family came in and ordered an abundant meal.  My mind wondered why people do that to themselves.  And then I realized, Hello Stephanie, YOU are at Arctic Circle eating lunch in a pair of pants that used to fit you a lot looser than they do now.  And it has been a struggle for you.  I talked to my girlfriends about it last night and we joked how maybe it wasn’t a different lady up there at all, but a mirror and I was ridiculously criticizing my own reflection.  Because I kind of was.

So in light of all this recent self-discovery, I’ve been thinking a lot about these quotes here (below) and trying to figure out how I can move them from the “great ideas” category to a whole-new state of mind, a new way of seeing people. If I can really understand it, I can take “stop judging” off my to-do list and put “love as He loves” on my to-be list. …..

“..The Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.”  –1 Samuel 16:7

“Who am I to judge another when I walk imperfectly?  In the quiet heart is hidden sorrow that the eye can’t see.”  –Hymn #221

“If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” –Mother Teresa

“[Charity] It is accepting people as they truly are. It is looking beyond physical appearances to attributes that will not dim through time. It is resisting the impulse to categorize others.”  –Thomas S. Monson

Then I watched this video today, and I thought, I can do better.  I can.

I wish there were an easy way to just actually get to know people and get past what they seem to be, like some soul x-ray or something.  Moroni taught that the gift of charity is something we should pray for, so I guess that’s a good place to start.  In the meantime, I’m eating large doses of humble pie, and just hoping it doesn’t make my pants any tighter than they already are.

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[p.s.  I need a volunteer for Find-a-Friend Friday this week.  With everyone on vacation and summering and such, my gracious volunteers are sometimes late to get invitations or unable to participate right away.  I’ll start giving out more advance notice throughout the rest of the summer, but meanwhile, does anybody feel like answering lots of questions about yourself in the next two days?  I’ll go ahead and take the first volunteer in the comments (check your email!), and if anyone else is interested, I’ll add you to the list for later.]