What are some of your best choices? The ones you’d never change?
Category Archives: Diapers
The dirty side of motherhood.
The wisdom of an immature mind
My daughter Natalie is a 4-year-old genius. (Doesn’t she look great in my glasses?) She’s like a grown-up, intelligent woman in a little tiny body . . . assuming that the grown-up, intelligent woman pees her pants a lot and screams like she’s being axe-murdered when her socks “feel funny.” Anyway. I was looking through some old abandoned drafts and I found this comment that Natalie made to me one morning. It wasn’t just any morning. It was one of those mornings where you’ve decided to give up before the sun even rises. I think I actually crawled back into bed and told her that I’d decided to stay in bed all day and hide. She bellowed with great sincerity: “Nooooo. We love you. We want you to get up every day.” I have to admit, it made me feel better, and I (mostly) recovered and survived the day.
This past Sunday, I arrived at church in a tizzy because I don’t care if we had church at 6:45 p.m., we would still be scrambling to get out the door on time. It’s pathetic. And in this case, I was pretty convinced that our family was hopeless, and that I was destined to be the lone, unappreciated crusader to get my family out the door and to church on time without missing any major articles of clothing. I was annoyed. During sacrament meeting, the hymns and prayers and sacrament began to cool me down (as they are designed to do), and at some point Natalie leaned over and whispered to Matt, “Daddies don’t have diamonds in their rings because they don’t make dinner.”
I love that girl.
That’s all. Carry on.
Words! Words! Words! I’m so sick of words!
Do you remember that song from My Fair Lady? Thanks to my dad, I will forever have all the lyrics of all the songs from that show in my perma-memory.
Anyway.
I need to take a word vacation.
I think my brain is a little bit overloaded, and the more I blabber on about stuff, the less it makes sense. At the advice of several people whom I respect, I registered for a writing conference in May, where I will actually be pitching my book idea to an editor. And just so you know, as soon as I made that appointment, I kind of had a panic attack because . . . seriously, I don’t even have a book yet. It’s mostly still in the ideas and research stage, with a sketchy outline. So the little devil in my head gave me a big long lecture about what a poser I am and boy, oh boy, how I’m going to make a fool of myself. And even though the little devil in my head is usually wrong, I thought it would at least be a good idea to dedicate myself to some serious preparation. In short, I need to work on my book project.
So, I’m going to step back a little bit from the blogging world and focus my scattered word-spilling into something a little more cohesive. I’ll still do my regular features (General Conference Book Club and Find-A-Friend Friday), but my posting will be much less frequent, and I need to take a break from visiting and reading blogs too. I just need to harness my time and energy so that I can be ready for this next adventure . . . and frankly to protect myself from public humiliation.
If I were going to write a bunch of posts this week, they would be about this:
- My house looks like a disaster every night. Food and dishes still on the table and in the sink. Unfinished laundry spread around the family room. Folded clothes moved from my bed to the floor. (And, yes, I will try to avoid sentence fragments like this in my book.) Some people can’t go to bed when that kind of mess is looming around them, but not me. Boy, I love to bid it farewell and go to sleep. I function so much better in the morning, so I just get up and face it while the kids are eating breakfast and getting ready for school. My renewed energy allows me to clean, sweep, wipe, fold, put away, etc. without feeling like I’d rather run away to a deserted island. Which I’d still like to do, by the way, but not out of desperation. Moral of the story: You’re allowed to visit me between the hours of 10 am and 2 pm.
- I took Natalie to a specialist yesterday and found out that a recently-discovered condition that I’ve been really worried about is probably not as bad as it seemed. A few more tests will be done to make sure, but mostly I feel reassured, and that’s such a relief.
- I’m reading a book called The Infinite Atonement, and so far it’s really good. Not the easiest reading, but some really cool insights. Here’s a little sentence that totally jumped out at me yesterday: “What is the Atonement of Jesus Christ? It is, in short, that suffering endured, that power displayed, and that love manifested by the Savior . . . ,” and then this: “The ability of man to be at one with God in both location and in likeness is possible only because the Savior first became at one with man in location, thorough his mortal birth, and at one with man in likeness, through his assumption of man’s frailties– without ever abandoning his godlike character.” Such a cool, simple way to explain the purpose and function of the Atonement.
- Last week on our date night, we went to a bookstore and Matt bought himself three or four new books (He’s kind of excited about his new post-Bar free time), and he bought me one too. Right up my alley.
- Since I’ve been thinking about this for my own book, I just wanted to say that being a mother is really, really cool. It is the one role on earth that most closely mimics the ministry of Jesus Christ. It’s a privilege to be in that crash-course adventure of becoming like Him.
Just so you know, this less-words business is going to be tricky for me, but I think it will be good for me too. And hopefully it will get the devil in my head to shut up a little.
En boca cerrada, no entran moscas.
(photo credit)
Translation: In a shut mouth, flies cannot get in.
Interpretation: Sometimes silence is the best option.
Even though my mind has been really busy, none of it has seemed very blog-worthy, and no one wants to bore others on purpose. So here’s a brief report of the happenings around here lately:
- Matt is on his way home right now from finishing day two of the Bar exam. It was hard. He feels nervous. I gave him a hard time about “You’d better pass or I’m getting a nanny and going to Hawaii for two weeks to recover,” (because I’ve been single-parenting for so long while he’s done law school and studied for the test, and because I’m so supportive like that), but I know he really did his best and we just have to wait for fate to play itself out. I really am proud of him, regardless of the outcome.
- When it’s a school holiday and you are trying to keep your children under control so your husband can study, might I suggest driving an hour and a half to an indoor swimming place and letting them swim for FIVE hours? They will be so tired that they can’t even speak on the way home and then you simply have to tuck them into bed on arrival. Plus you get to sit in a chair and read books while you “supervise” them. (I fully admit that I have entered a new stage of life where my children are big enough to need minimal supervision. This would have never been possible in the last 8 years. I acknowledge the new-found blessing, and I embrace it.)
- I have been using MyJobChart.com for a few weeks and it has worked so well with my kids. I just want to mention how much it warmed my heart when Grant — the child I have been butting heads with lately– spent his very first hard-earned job points on “Mom time.” I still can’t believe it.
- Have you ever noticed that even though you complain a lot about something and even have small-scale tantrums about it, as soon as you make it a matter of prayer, progress is made, and then you feel like an idiot for complaining so much in the first place? Cases in point: 1. Boo hoo, poor me, I’m new and it’s hard to make friends. –> More people than I ever imagined signed up for my girls’ night out and made me feel like a rock star, plus some little doors cracked open and I’ve felt some positive opportunities for new friendships. 2. I’m annoyed with the school situation here. I wish I could find some better options for my boys. –> I got a phone call saying that they had both (literally) won the lottery and were accepted into a well-reputed charter school. 3. I feel a little “underwhelmed in the kingdom.” I miss teaching. –> I got an invitation to substitute for an Institute class at BYU and some random emails with loose invitations for possible speaking assignments. Common ingredient in all three “solutions”: prayer.
- I think I might have been marked in the pre-existence as “the one who will always have library fines.” I’m just faithful at fulfilling my destiny, that’s all.
- I am so sick of filling out medical history forms. Shouldn’t there be some big database out there for that? Kind of like ancestry.com, except it’s more like diseasesofyourancestors.com. I should really market that.
- Clark just came into the room singing about how happy he is. When I asked him why, he replied, “Grant said he’s going to run away because he hates me.” I’m so proud of the loving family I’ve raised. *shaking head*
See? Sometimes silence is the best option.
My anthem.
I listen to Christian radio in the car. You should try it some time. It really makes you feel better, especially if you crank it up really loud so you can’t hear your children. Anyway, this is my new favorite song. Let it say what it will about my life.
Here’s a link if you can’t see the video.
(p.s. Today is the last call for girls’ night out. See here for more info. If you said yes, you should have received and replied to an email from me so I know to buy you a ticket for sure.)
Diapers and Divinity 