I think about the pornography one because it unfortunately has hit too close to home in my life (family of origin) and I’ve seen how destructive it can be. And I think that as women we tend to a) be very naive and b) think it’s a male problem and not something we can do much about and c) be so (rightfully) disgusted/fearful of the topic that we just avoid it. I do sometimes fear that there’s not enough that I can do for my sons, but here are some of my ideas for what I can do:

Point out problem areas and give examples of what to do–i.e. when you see the big Victoria’s Secret displays at the mall, tell them why they’re inappropriate and tell them to look away.

I think it’s a good idea to give lots of information and guidance before they’re old enough to take it very personally–for example, when I first started teaching about not looking at photos of naked bodies, my kids couldn’t imagine why anyone would think naked bodies were tempting to look at, but I told them that a time will come when it will be tempting, so they have to already start good habits of resisting.

Teach them by word and example what’s good and happy about faithful husband/wife relationships. Teach them that sex within a faithful marriage is well worth looking forward to. Remind boys that they will have a great, important calling as a righteous father that will bring them confidence and joy.

Avoid what I call female pornography–sex in books and magazine articles; vulgar/obscene blogs or websites; being involved in vulgar/obscene conversations.

I think the whole big picture of intentional righteous parenting helps a whole lot, too–those are just some of my specific ideas for teaching chastity.

Oh, and here’s one story that made me think I’m on the right track at least so far:

My son Isaac, who’s almost 12, said to me, “You know that thing on TAMN’s blog that says, ‘My heart belongs to my husband, but my neck belongs to Edward?” “Yeah?” “Well, that’s kind of–not right.” I agreed, and told him a funny story about my cousin, who was reading one of the Twilight books and discovered that everywhere the name “Edward” appeared, her husband had crossed it off and replaced it with his name. Isaac said, “He should have crossed off everywhere it says the girl’s name [Bella] and put your cousin’s name, too. Otherwise it’s like they’re both being bad.”

I like Sister Beck too. She’s not afraid to tell the sisters of the Church that we can and must do better. Sometimes I think (I know it’s true for me) that I like to continually be patted on the back for all the sacrifices of motherhood and wifehood. While praise is good, it’s too often an opportunity to become complacent and self-centered. She reminds us that we’re not there yet and improvement and excellence are the goals.